So,  life as a language school student can sometimes feel much more mundane than someone who is a missionary already serving in a foreign country.  I can’t say that I have many amazing stories to share these days because really the bulk of my time is spent either in class everyday or at home just studying, doing homework, and trying to put into practice what I have been learning.  It really is amazing on how fast a day goes by for me these days.  A normal day might look like this:

6:15 AM – Wake up

6:30 AM – Actually get out of bed, shower, get dressed, etc

7:00AM – Steal away for 15 minutes to spend time with the Lord in His word and prayer

7:15 AM – Eat breakfast and run out the door to make it to class by 7:30

7:30 AM – Grammar class for 2 hours

9:30 AM – Tues and Thur we have chapel, the other days I usually get alone somewhere and read my Bible and spend time with the Lord, or on a bad day, I’m cramming to get homework done for my upcoming class.  But truthfully, that really doesn’t happen that often.

10:30 AM – Language class.  This is the class where we just have conversation in Spanish the entire time.  We usually are given a topic that we need to be prepared to discuss.

11:30 AM – Phonetics class.  This is where we are learning how to pronounce words, read, etc.

12:30 PM – Classes end.  Walk home

12:45 PM – Lunch

1:00 PM – Rest, chill with wife and kids, maybe do some homework, usually go on computer to check email, FB, etc.  Sometimes Almost always seem to get into deep conversation with Maria about God, life, mission, family, etc.  haha.

2:30 PM – On Monday and Wednesday I take Isabela to her after-school gymnastics program.  While there, I usually study or do homework.

4:00 PM – walk back home with Isabela, pass by the park where she sometimes convinces me to stay for a few minutes so that she can get her monkey swings in.

4:30 PM – Maybe take some time to read the Bible if I hadn’t yet already done so, maybe play some wii with Isabela for an hour, maybe take a quick nap, or maybe resume deep conversation with wife.  Usually we have to go to the market to buy the food needed for the meal.

5:30 PM – Dinner

6:00 PM – Hang out with family, maybe do some homework

7:00 PM – Maybe watch some Little House on the Prairie with family, read, research on computer, etc.

8:00 PM – Put Isabela to bed (Read and discuss the Bible with her for about 20-25 minutes, prayers, hugs and kisses)

8:30 PM – Chill with wife.  Either resume more deep conversation, watch a movie together, read on our kindles, etc

10:30 PM – Go to bed.  Either read on kindle for a while or watch an episode of 24 on DVD.

So…that’s about what an average day looks like for us these days.  Mixed in with that are the opportunities we get to be involved in a few ministries.  Every Friday, I attend a Bible Study either in the mountains or on the coast with a small group from the church that I attend.  On Sunday, we attend church in the morning and then I attend another Bible study at 3PM that is at the Institute.  So, on weeks that I am scheduled to teach, my free time is spent studying and preparing for the teaching.  Saturdays are usually our free days.  We usually go somewhere, whether food shopping, a little fun trip downtown, hang out with some friends, etc.  I am hoping soon to get involved in a ministry to inner city kids, but so far we have always had something going on.

So, the truth is that language learning is a full time deal.  It takes a lot of effort.  It takes a lot of practice.  And yes, it takes a lot of my time.  But I know that it is an investment.  I may not be able to do much in terms of ministry right now, but I am learning this language so that next year we will be able to live in a spanish speaking country and bring the message of Christ to all those we encounter.  So, for now, it seems like time is sacrificed to language study, but all for the purpose of having all the time in the world to share the message of Christ with those whom the Lord sends us to.  So, it is definitely worth it all.

I did get to go to my first ever professional soccer game last week.  I loved it.  About 9 of the guys from the Institute all went together.  We had a great time.  I’m looking forward to the next one.  I was surprised how cheap it was for tickets.  We are planning on going to see the national team play against Honduras in April.  We will also be traveling to Nicaragua next month for a few days along with many other students.  It is required for us to do this because we have to leave the country every 3 months since we are not residents.  So, hopefully we can use that time to see what Nicaragua is all about.

Ok, that’s about it for now.  Now, I’m off to take Isabela to gymnastics.  Peace.

Most of you probably already know, but for those who do not, our family was robbed at gunpoint in our home 2 nights ago and many shots were fired in our home.  We are very shaken up by this ordeal.  We need you all to be praying for us and all the other missionaries here in Jacmel, Haiti as we were the 3rd missionary family this month to have this happen.

Due to the fact that it had already happened to 2 other friends of ours, many of us had been talking about ways that we can better prepare ourselves in case of a home invasion.  Therefore, when it happened to us, we were more prepared so that they didn’t get away with hardly anything, but nothing can prepare a person so that they are not emotionally affected by such a violation…and that’s exactly how we feel at this very moment…violated.

It happened on Tuesday night at about 2AM.  Maria was just telling me that night before we went to sleep that she was very afraid and felt like it would just be a matter of time before the robbers hit up our house.  They seem to be on a pattern of about once every 2 weeks, and Maria was telling me that night that it was coming up on two weeks since our friends were robbed.  I told her that it was not good to talk about such things just before trying to go to sleep.  I told her that she would just have nightmares and not be able to sleep.  Well, little did we know that we would be living the nightmare just a few hours later.

She woke me up at 1:50 in the morning telling me that she just saw somebody outside our window.  I thought she might just have been paranoid since she was just talking about it before going to bed.  I didn’t dismiss it either, but I did ask her if she was really sure.  She said that she was positive.  So, in silence we both listened, and within seconds we heard some activity, like a scraping sound outside our bedroom window.  I told her to call our friend immediately and have her call the police.  We then woke up Isabela who we have had sleeping in our room for the past week because of these robberies.  I then ran to Isabela’s room and woke up my friend who was visiting with us for a few days.  I told him to be quiet and that we were being robbed.

Once I made sure that Maria and Isabela and the baby were in our designated safe place, my friend and I ran through the house trying to find a weapon of some sort to fend off the robbers.  As we did this, we started screaming really loud to try to scare them off.  We even let a few obscenities slip out of our mouth as we were just screaming and telling them to get out of here.  The scraping sounds then became louder as they realized that they no longer had to be quiet since we knew they were there.  So, then they just started banging on our window and it sounded like they had a crowbar trying to break the bars that were over the window.

Unfortunately, the only “weapon” that I was able to find was my daughter’s scooter and my friend had one of our kitchen stools.  It was so silly, but that’s all that we could find.  I started screaming at them in Creole letting them know that the police were on their way with guns and that I had friends coming with guns.  My friend who did not speak Creole just dropped a few more obscenities.  But nothing fazed these guys, and soon after we heard several gun shots.  We immediately dropped our weapons of choice and realized that the only thing we could do was hide ourselves in the bedroom and try to block them out.  First, I ran to the front door and purposely tripped off our small radio shack alarm that we had just installed a few weeks ago.  This caused a loud siren noise which I hoped would scare them off.  It did not work.  They just seemed to get more upset, and they fired off a few more shots.  Then I heard them coming towards the front door.  At that point, I had already retreated to the bedroom to make sure that my family was still in the safe place.  In haste, I did not re-lock the front door even though the outside metal gate door was already padlocked.

When I got to the bedroom, I told Maria not to hide in the bathroom as we had planned because there was a window there and I was afraid that the thieves would shoot through the window.  So, I had them gather in an area of the bedroom where they were not in front of a window or a door.  Maria was nursing the baby so that he would remain calm.  Isabela was doing a great job remaining calm and not crying.  All of us were operating under God’s grace.  Then, we heard them break through the front door.  My friend pushed our dresser against the door and tried to make a barricade as he braced himself against the dresser.  I stayed in the corner with Maria and the kids.  We heard them go into a room, unfortunately it was the room where my friend was sleeping and we later learned that they took his ipad and his iphone.

Then it got much worse.  They started trying to get into our bedroom.  We saw the handle turn back and forth.  Then they started banging away on the door.  More shots were fired.  I had no idea that the shots were being fired through the door until another shot was fired and the lamp on the dresser smashed.  My friend was just behind the dresser bracing it up against the door.  We later saw the bullet hole in the dresser that was inches away from my friend’s head.  God’s protection was upon us for sure.

Soon, I realized that they were going to be able to get into the room, it was just a matter of seconds or minutes.  So, I made the decision to surrender to them.  I had no other choice.  So, I shouted in Creole, “Ok, Ok, I’m coming out.  I have money.  Just please don’t shoot.  I have a baby in here.  Please don’t shoot.  I’ll give you the money.”  They agreed and said that they would not shoot and that they just wanted the money.

So, in that moment, I was the most helpless than I have ever been in a dangerous situation.  I did not know what I was opening the door to.  I thought that I might be opening the door to a bullet to my head.  But I just had to trust the Lord and believe that He was still in control of all of this.  And He was.  I opened the door and slipped out so that the thieves never even got inside the room where my family was.  They never even saw any of them.  They never saw their guns, thank God.

Once I opened the door, I saw three guys in front of me and they all had their guns pointed at me.  The alarm was still going off, their flashlights were in my face so that  could not see them, but all I could see was their shadows and their arms extended with their chrome pistols pointed at me.  I tried to open the door to the office where our safe was located, but the door was jammed.  I kept trying to open it, and the thieves were getting mad.  They were probably thinking that I was trying to stall them, but I really wasn’t.  But looking back, I know that that was the hand of God because it did buy a few more minutes for the police to arrive, and those could have been life and death minutes.

The robber reached in my pocket trying to find a key, but I told him that there was no key. The door was just jammed.  So, another guy came back with a crow bar and with 3 fierce blows knocked the door in and kicked it wide open.  I went to the safe and opened it up to give them the money that we had kept there.  It was only $250.  When I gave them the money, they became angry.  They demanded more.  At that moment a few more shots were fired from the living room.  I think the thieves were shooting trying to get the alarm to stop.

The thieves in the room with me demanded that I give them the rest of the money.  I told them that I did not have anything else, but they were obviously not happy.  They started opening up drawers looking for more money.  I saw that they were not just going to leave with $250.  Just as I was about to tell them that I will try to find some more money, I heard a spray of shots and I heard a thief cry from the other room that the police were there.  And just like cockroaches in the light, they all fled in a split second.

I ran back to the room and saw that my family was all safe.  We all stayed in the room until our friend called to let us know that the police were outside and that it was okay to come out.

So, that’s the story.  It was one of the scariest moments of my life.  It is still surreal as I think about it, but with each hour that passes the reality sets in that bullets were shot through my own bedroom door where my wife and children were on the other side.  And that makes me MAD!  These thieves could have killed my little girl or my wife or my baby boy.  Four shots were fired through the door that went clearly through and put a hole in the wall on the other side of the room.  If any of us had been in front of the door during that time, we could have been killed.  And that makes me MAD!

We are terribly shaken up by this ordeal.  We have hardly slept at all at night since this happened.  We are staying with a friend down the road, but we are still scared because these thieves are still on the loose.

Under the full support of our mission board, we will be returning to the states just to get some healing and counsel in a safe place as we try to work through these issues.  Please pray that God would continue to lead, guide, and direct our steps.  We are flying back tomorrow.

Pray for all the missionaries here who are scared and having a lot of difficulty sleeping at night.  Pray for the conviction of God to fall mightily on these thieves, that they would have a radical encounter with God and realize the darkness that they are living in.  Pray that they would repent.  And if they don’t repent, pray that we all would leave vengeance in the hands of the Lord because I know that their judgment will be great on the day that they stand before God and have to give account for harming God’s people.  It will be a day where I myself will declare, “Lord, all your judgments are just.”  Please pray for us.  Pray for Isabela who has been through so much in these last few years along with all of us.  It is overwhelming.  First the earthquake, then Susana’s cancer, then Susana being taken to Heaven and the grief that we carry, and now this horrible violation.  It is just a lot for any one of us to handle.  Pray for us please.

The Christian world today is becoming more and more involved, and sometimes obsessed, with serving the poor.  And in many ways, this is a good thing since the church at large has remained comfortable for so long behind her 4 walls.  So, I do applaud the church for taking some radical steps to start serving the poor.  But I’m starting to think that there is another definition of poor, or perhaps that we need to re-define the word poor.  So, here’s the question that Maria and I have been wrestling with lately:

Which is more poor?  Is it the person who only maybe eats one meal a day, has one set of clothes, has a 4th grade education, and goes to church 3 times a week to hear God’s Word, rejoice in His promises, and worship Him among other believers, then returns home to sleep with their 5 children in their tiny one room house?  Or is it the 2 income family who has a child in University, has a nice car, nice house, but absolutely no knowledge of the gospel of Jesus Christ because they have never heard the message of salvation because they live in a country where there is no Christian witness, no church, no missionaries, no Christian outreach. Nothing.  So, they live their comfortable lives of pleasure, greed, and hedonism because that’s all they know,without realizing that they are headed towards eternal destruction.

So…who do you think is more poor?  Whom would Jesus say is more poor?

I love seeing my little girl learn.  Just a year ago, she did not know how to read or write, and today my little scholar is reading like crazy and writing her own stories.  Her and I read and study the Bible every night and I am so excited to see how much she is retaining and understanding.  She can tell you every topic that Jesus talked about on the sermon on the mount.  What a joy it is to see her grow in knowledge and wisdom.  I am a proud Daddy!

So, here is her first story.  Yes, it is very simple, but she just sat down the other day and started writing.  It wasn’t part of her home schooling or anything.  She just shocked me when she came up and said, “Do you wanna hear my story that I just wrote?”  So, I told her that I was so impressed that I felt it should be posted on our blog.  So, show some love to my little girl Isabela and let her know what you think.  I’m sure she will be greatly encouraged.  I typed it out exactly the way that she wrote it.  I am so impressed.  By the way, she is 7 years old.  Enjoy.

Title – “Jonh and his frends”

By – Isabela

Cool said Jonh.  He just got a soccer ball.  Can I play with it?  Yes, but first clen your room.  Ok said Jonh.  then he went to clen his room.  Knock knock Sam was here.  Jonh come here. said mom. ok. said Jonh.  Hi Jonh. Said Sam.  Hi Sam. Said Jonh. Ok now why don’t you two go and play said mom. Ok said the boys.  I’m going to cook. said mom.  Before they cold go play they herd a knock on the door.  Dad’s here said Jonh.  The boys stopped what they were doing and rushed to the door.  Hey you two. Said Dad.  Can you play with us. Said the boys.  Yes, but first I’m going to say hi to mom. said dad.  Ok said the boys.  Mom, Dad’s here!  said Jonh.  Sam, Jonh. time for diner. said mom.  Ok said the boys.  What did you make for diner? said Sam. chicken. said mom.  Cool. said Sam.  they ate diner then dad said to go to bed. The End.

That’s my little girl!  I love her creativity.  Ok my peeps, show some comment love to my little author.  Perhaps she’ll sign your own copy of her first novel some day.

A few nights ago, I had to have a serious talk with my daughter Isabela.  We talked about how Maria and I noticed that she was getting quite fresh with her attitude and the way she often responds to us.  We talked about how Maria and I have been rather slack on disciplining her in the last year simply because of all that has transpired in our lives.  It was really hard to enforce rules, schedule, order, etc, when we were living out of suitcases in hospitals and hotel rooms.  So, I told her that we were going to get back to the right way of disciplining and we would get back to enforcing our discipline…aka the use of the pow-pow stick on the bottom.  Yes, we spank and we’re not afraid to say so.

Anyway, Isabela and I had a long talk about the need for her attitude to change and our reason for enforcing discipline so that she will grow into a Godly young woman who knows how to show respect to the Lord, to others, and to herself.  It was a good, but very firm talk.  She was nervous part of the time because she thought that I was going to give her a pow-pow right then and there.  But I told her straight up what the consequences will be from here on in with regards to certain behaviors that show disrespect (talking back, making demands as if she tells us what to do, and disobedience or delayed obedience)  So, we had a good talk.  And she understood what was going on.

Later that night, she had a fresh tone with Maria, and so I looked at her and told her that now she has to get a pow-pow.  She started crying like crazy and asking for another chance, telling us how sorry she was.  I didn’t budge and told her that it was time to get a pow-pow.  And so, the pow-pow was given.  Buns were red.  Tears were shed.  Prayers were made.  And discipline was given.

Less than ten minutes later, after I was the “bad guy” in dishing out the punishment, my little girl asks me to tuck her into bed, gives me a great big hug and kiss, gets all silly, and then asks me to pray for her.  So, I prayed to God over my little girl and then kissed her nite nite.

Early the next morning as I went before the Lord to spend some time with Him, I was reminded of the previous night and how I was strict and firm with my discipline, that I caused my little girl pain and tears in bringing about correction to a bad attitude, and how minutes later she was laughing, hugging me, and asking me to pray for her and tuck her in.  I was amazed at how soon she turned towards me with such affection and love just moments after I reddened her bottom.

And I thought about my relationship with God and realized that that is exactly how I should be with the Lord after He brings about correction in my life.  He disciplines me for ONE reason only…He loves me.  Just like I discipline my little girl for the same reason.  And she gets it.  It was almost like my enforcing of the rules and bringing about correction caused her to see my love for her.  Perhaps deep down inside, she was thankful for the discipline because she saw my love for her through it.  Wow.

I want to understand the Lord’s love for me like that after I feel Him bringing about His corrective hand of discipline in my life.  I want to see that He is simply loving me with His discipline.  I want to have that same response of just wanting to be close to Him and express my love and thanks to Him even just minutes after He disciplines me.  I want to be just like my little girl was towards me right after I “corrected” her.

Hebrews chapter 12 states that “The Lord disciplines those He loves, and chastises those whom He calls His sons.”  Oh, I am so thankful that His discipline reveals to me that I am His son whom He loves. – Cody

She radiates beauty inside and out!!!!!

My love, I am very blessed to have such a woman as you.  You are the best thing that has ever happened to me.  So, here’s to you on your birthday.  I thank the Lord for you and I am thankful that we get to share this journey together.  You are beautiful.  Feliz Cumpleanos…Bon Fet…Happy Birthday!!!!!  Te amo mucho mi amor!!!!  Mwen renmen ‘ w anpil cheri mwen!!!!  I love you so much!!!!

Well, these days the Lord continues to reveal Himself to me and draw me closer to Him.  My times alone with Him may not end with me being in tears being so overwhelmed by His love and His glory.  They may not necessarily be filled with so much emotion as in the recent months, but nonetheless, I know that He is with me, and I am filled with a constant peace knowing that I am my beloved’s and He is mine.

As I was sharing these things with Maria a few nights ago, I likened it to the story of Peter when he was on the mountain while Jesus was transfigured right before his eyes.  What a cool story.  Peter is up on the mountain with Jesus along with the two other disciples, James and John.  All of a sudden, Jesus is transfigured before Him and he sees Jesus shining in radiant glory.  And to make it even more awesome, Moses and Elijah also appear on the scene, and they all hear the voice of God from heaven.  Peter is so taken back and in awe, that he thinks it best to camp out on the mountain, therefore he asks Jesus if they should all make shelters so that they can stay there.  When they hear the voice of God, they all fall facedown in awe.  Then Jesus tells them, “Get up”, and when they do, all is back to normal and Jesus and the disciples head back down the mountain.

So, I think this story describes well my own experiences with the Lord these past few months.  I feel like I was brought up to the mountain and Jesus was transfigured right before my eyes.  I mean, truly, I have never seen Jesus the way that I see Him now.  I feel like I have seen His glory, His radiance, His goodness, His mercy, His power, all for the first time in my life.  He has in some way become so much more to me.  I have seen things in Jesus that I had never seen before.  So, just like Peter, I too have seen Jesus transfigured before my eyes.  And also, like Peter, I would love to build a shelter and just remain there forever.  I mean, when the Lord is revealed in all His glory, how would a person not want to remain there forever?  Seriously, that is why we eagerly wait for heaven where we will indeed see Him as He fully is, and we will have no other desire but to fall down and worship Him forever.  And that is how I have felt in these last few months.  I have had such experiences with God that have left me desiring just to camp out in that place forever.

But, just like Jesus told the disciples, He tells me also, “Get up.”  And He leads me back down the mountain.  And I go…hesitantly.

And so, my days may appear to be back to a place of “normal” and my times alone with Him may not require a box of kleenex to be so close by.  But this I know, I am not the way I was.  I may not weep every day, but I long for Him every day.  I may not fall to the ground on the bathroom floor being overcome by His glory, but I worship Him every day.  My heart and voice are raised to Him in songs of love and sweet surrender.  I am yielded to Him.  My heart seeks Him.  His word is my desire and my light.  He has become a greater constant in my life.  I know more than ever that He is with me.  And this gives me a constant joy no matter what situations I find myself in.  He is becoming more and more all sufficient to me.  I have seen the Lord and I am forever changed.

I was only permitted to stay on the mountain for a time.  Perhaps He will bring me there again sometime for another brief encounter as He seems to do with the saints of God from time to time.  But the times of building shelters and camping out  are reserved for another time and place that will only come when the last trumpet sounds and the saints of God are raised in immortality.  O, how my heart yearns within me for the day that I will see God.

Happy Anniversary to my beautiful bride!!!! – Maria and I celebrated our 8th year anniversary by sneaking away for a day and night at a beautiful cabin near the Great Smokey Mountains.  We had a wonderful time together.  The cabin was great, beautiful view, quiet, great outdoor hot tub, and all things good.  We sat in the hot tub last night staring at the stars and marveling at the vastness of God.  To think that those stars were all put there by Him and are held there by Him is overwhelming.  We shared in the words of David that “such knowledge is too wonderful for me and too lofty for me to attain.”  Yes, the Lord is BIG!  He is MIGHTY.  And He is LOVE.  He is all we need in this life and eternity.  So, we had a great time sharing our lives together and reflecting on what the Lord is doing in our lives.  We have had some incredibly challenging years in our marriage, but by His grace we have remained committed to walking through those times together.  And now the Lord is doing some deep work and healing in our lives and we rejoice in what He is doing and what He will continue to do.  I am blessed to have such a beautiful and God loving wife.

We began our morning in prayer on our knees together, yielded to our great and mighty God, surrendered to His will for our lives.  We talked about how frail and fragile is our human soul.  We are so delicate.  We break so easily.  We get distracted too quickly.  We forget too often.  We remember too much.  Yes, we are a delicate people.  Thank the Lord for His grace and mercy.  In Him we press on and seek more and more to become like Him, while our frailty and fragility simply remind us that we are not yet home in our permanent place, therefore we continue to long and yearn for our complete redemption when He comes to take us home.

We are so thankful to our friends, the Prevost’s and the Brown’s, for taking care of Isabela and Susana while we were away.  The body of Christ is such a blessing!

Back to Haiti next week – I will be heading back to Haiti next Wednesday to Sunday.  I am looking forward to getting back and spending time with many people that I have come to know and love.  I will be bringing a bunch of school supplies to give to the orphaned children.  I will be visiting with the children in the homes where they are currently staying in order to determine what needs remain.  Our sponsorship program should be up and running very soon.  I will also be meeting with another young guy I know that just started up an orphanage in Titanyen, an area outside of Port au Prince.  I will be assessing his orphanage and will be praying about whether or not the Lord will have us work with him and the children.  Since Global Outreach has a mission base right there in Titanyen, I will spend the night there visiting with the other missionaries, and then I will fly home Sunday morning.

I am also very excited about the progress that we are making with regards to getting large amounts of meals shipped over so that we can expand our feeding programs.  we have a contact in Florida who we are currently working with.  They are currently filling a 20 foot container with Kids Against Hunger meals that will be shipped to us in Jacmel.  They plan to start doing this a few times per year so that we have a consistent food supply coming in for the feeding programs and orphanages that we are wanting to help.  Please pray for the logistics to be worked out with regards to shipping and receiving.

We have a team coming in December and another possibly in November.  The December team is a college group that is coming down to hand out Christmas shoeboxes to several hundred children, including of course the orphans that we are working with.  They will be shipping the boxes over within the next few weeks to insure that they arrive by December.  Please pray for the details to be worked out and that the boxes arrive in time.

I am happy that our 4 wheel drive pickup truck is now in our possession.  Thanks to our Ministry Director Fenel, who traveled to St Mark for 3 days to work on getting it out of customs and then to Port au Prince for a day to get it registered and insured.  So, now we have a pickup truck to be able to haul supplies and food.

Pray that the Lord continues to give us vision and direction for what we are to do in Haiti.  There are so many needs and so many possibilities to minister, but we just want to be in step with the leading of the Holy Spirit.

Update on Susana – Susana had surgery a few weeks ago to have the tumor removed after getting back tests that showed that it had shrunk by more than half its size and that all the other tumors were gone.  The surgery was very successful as they were able to remove 90% of the tumor and they cauderized (seared) the remaining 10%.  She is healing great and is feeling great.  Tomorrow, we go back to the hospital for her last round of chemo here before we head off to Duke for 3 months for her stem cell transplant.  So, we are getting ready for a long stretch of time where we will be away from home and in the hospital every day.  Please pray for God’s strength over us.

We are so thankful for how she has responded to treatment thus far.  She could not have responded better.  So, we pray that she continues to respond so well that these tumors never return…ever.  My prayer is that Susana lives to be a very old woman, seeing both her own children and grandchildren grow up.  And I’ll make sure that her house is next door from us so that Maria and I get to witness as much as possible.  Anyway…that’s our prayer.  And I will continue to pray everyday for that to happen.

I don’t know all there is to know about prayer.  Its a mystery that I will never understand on this side of heaven.  I mean, prayer doesn’t change God’s mind and direction.  He already knows the beginning from the end.  But what I do know is that Jesus gave us models and examples for prayer, and the 2 examples that keep me on my knees for my daughter every day is the story Jesus told about the man that asked his neighbor for bread late at night because he had a guest.  The man kept banging on the door because it was late at night and his neighbor did not feel like getting out of bed to answer the door, but Jesus said that the neighbor will finally get up and give his bread away simply because of the other man’s persistence.  So, this teaches me to keep being persistent in praying for Susana’s healing.  The other story that Jesus told was about the woman who was wronged and went to a judge day after day demanding that she get justice.  Jesus said that even though the judge does not fear God or care about this woman’s case, that He will grant her justice simply because she is persistent.  Again, I am encouraged by these verses to continue praying for my little Susana.   Jesus states, “Ask and it shall be given to you, seek and you shall find, knock and the door shall be opened to you.  For everyone who asks is given, and everyone who seeks, finds, and all who knock, the door is opened.”  And I am reminded also of the story of David and Bathsheba when they had their first child who died as a result of God’s judgment on David for his adultery.  But, even though he was told that the child was going to die, he fasted and prayed like never before.  He sought the Lord.  He pleaded for mercy.  He did not stop.  And it wasn’t until he received word that the child died that he finally got off the floor and ate.  So too I will remain on the floor pleading for God’s mercy until the Lord answers in one way or another.  and I hope you will all do the same.

Personally – God continues to draw me closer to Him than I have ever been.  I am still brought to my knees every morning and sometimes even throughout my day.  I stand in thankfulness for what He has done in my heart.  My soul longs to know Him more.  I long for Him to continue to radically change my heart and bring it to life.  I long for Him to radically change my marriage and make whole all that has been broken, and restore all the lost years that the locust swarms of sin and selfishness have devoured.  I long for Him to use me to lead my family into greater truth and righteousness.  I long to see Him heal my daughter.  I long for Him to use my family to reach the lost and minister His love and truth to the poor.   I just want Him to be the absolute center, to borrow the words of John Piper, that Jesus would be the sun in my universe in which all the planets of my being would orbit around in harmony and order.  That is my prayer.

of the glory of God (Rom. 5:2) – Yes, our ultimate hope is found in the glory of God which has been fully expressed in the person of Jesus Christ.  2 Cor. 4:6 states that God has shined His light in our hearts “to give us the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ.  O, how my heart delights in seeing the face of Jesus, and how I yearn to see Him more.

If our hope is in the glory of God, then nothing could ever shatter that hope.  It is a hope that cannot be moved.  it cannot be shaken.  Because the glory of God is eternal, immovable, and altogether wonderful.  Everything that Jesus has done for us (forgiving our sins, reconciling us back into fellowship with the Father, bringing us from darkness into light, loving us so much, preparing a place in heaven for those who trust Him, etc) reveals the amazing goodness of the glory of God.  That is why Rom. 8:38 states so beautifully and powerfully, “For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

Friend, if you do not know this Jesus as YOUR Lord and Savior, I encourage you to get on your knees and cry out for Him.  It is God who hears the cries of the broken, the ones who realize that they have sinned greatly and have separated themselves from God by doing their own thing.  But it is also God who answers the cries of the broken and heals, restores, forgives, delivers, and reveals His glory!  We cannot work for this.  We can only cry out.  It is purely the work of God.  He will declare it to be so, not us.  Just like creation, He spoke the word and it was so.  Think about what it says in 2 Cor. 4:6 of what I mentioned above.  Look at the whole verse. “For God, who said, ‘Let light shine out of darkness’, made His light shine in our hearts to give us the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ.”  O, how wonderful that God made His light shine in my heart so that I may see Jesus.  What about you?

Ok, the truth is that I sat down to write a post about our daughter Susana and inform all of you how she is doing with her cancer, but since God has opened my eyes to see His wonder and glory, everything that I think about now and desire to write about is wrapped up in His love and truth.  I will share about Susana, but let me first finishe my original thought…

So, we see that we can rejoice in the hope of the glory of God as stated in Rom. 5:2, because of Jesus, but we also see that we can rejoice…

in our sufferings - (Rom. 5:3).  Yes, with the glory of God being revealed to us, we not only rejoice in the hope that He gives us of His glory, but we also are able to rejoice in suffering.  Because the verses following state that “suffering with Christ produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope.  And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out His love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom He has given us.”  So, you see, even in suffering, we are brought right back to God through the Holy Spirit revealing the hope that we have because God loves us so much.

So, why do I share this?  Because I need to be reminded, as well as many others, that our hope is not in whether our circumstances in life are good or bad, favorable or unfavorable, bringing life or bringing death.  If we have a hope in the glory of God that is unshakable, then we have much reason to rejoice.  If we have a love from God from which nothing can separate us, whether it be death or life, angels or demons, etc, then we can rejoice always.  I mean, lets take just the negative words from that scripture so that we see further the power of His love.  So, if we just looked at the negative words, it would state, “For I am convinced that neither death, demons, future (unknown), powers, or depth (of any struggle or pain), nor anything in all of creation will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.”  AMAZING LOVE!!!!

Ok, regarding Susana and the reports that we got back from the doctor – everything looks great!!!!  And we rejoice in God.  But even if they looked bad, my point is for us to understand that, in Christ, we still have great reason to rejoice and stand unshakable.

Susana, who started this ordeal with a big golf ball size tumor on her adrenal gland, and many other tumors all throughout her body, including in her bone marrow and liver, now has only one tumor (the main tumor) that has shrunk down to the size of a walnut and has solidified itself so that it can be easily removed and a small other tumor on her stomach about the size of a dime that also can be easily removed.  That’s it!  There are no other visible tumors in her body!  Nothing in her bone marrow either.  The doctors are very pleased with the results of the chemo thus far.  The surgeons stated that they are confident that the tumors can be removed quite easily.  The surgery is scheduled for Wednesday.  It should last about 2 hours, and when she comes out of surgery, our little girl will not have any tumors in her body at all!  O, I get emotional just in writing that line.  We are very happy, and we certainly rejoice in how we see Him moving in Susana’s life as well as our whole family.

After surgery, she will stay inpatient for a few days just to heal.  Then, she will get one last round of chemo before going to Duke for 3 months for the stem cell transplant.  After Duke, we will be in Jacksonville, FL for a month for proton radiation therapy.  Then, back home for 6 months of antibody treatment.  So, even though she will not have any visible tumors as of Wed, we still need to continue all treatment so that, Lord willing, all cancer cells are forever destroyed and that she never relapses.  That is our prayer.  But so far, things are going as good as they can be going.

But I write what I write, not to set you all up who were reading with expectation, but to state the truth – Our greatest rejoicing is in a God who loves us, who has revealed His glory to us in the face of Christ Jesus, who gives us a greater joy than the world can ever give, who promises us eternity with Him, who walks daily with us, who will never leave us or forsake us, and who can sustain us even in our deepest darkest hours!  O yes, this is our God.  In Him, we rejoice.

You see, there are many people right now, some we know and some we don’t, that are battling life threatening diseases such as cancer, and they are not getting good reports from the doctors.  Instead of the tumors shrinking, they are growing.  Instead of the tumors going away, they are coming back.  There are those whose lives are slowly but surely ebbing away.  Their hope will not be found in their circumstances.  Their circumstances are just not good enough to hope in.  The truth is, nobody’s circumstances are good enough to hope in because they can be so fleeting.  Only a fool would hope in his circumstances only.  No, there is no reason for these that have life threatening diseases to hope in their circumstances.  But there is still a reason to hope.  In Christ, we have a hope that surpasses all understanding.  We stand on a rock that cannot be moved.  We rest on a promise that can never be broken.  We live in a love that will never fail.  And this is why we can rejoice no matter what happens in our life.

My prayers today go to those whose health circumstances are not looking good.  I only pray that they would hold fast to the hope that will never disappoint, never die, never fade, and never give up.  Pity the person without such hope. – Cody